Drafting

TVSS Krishna Tuesday, August 16, 2022 0

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3.1. Introduction

We have so far discussed about Noting and Types of communications Commonly used in Government offices in the first two units of this module. Now that we know the various types of communications, it is necessary to know about the drafting skills. The format used for each of the communications was also discussed in unit 2.

Hence let us limit our discussion only to the drafting skills, styles in noting and drafting here. You may now ask a question, why we should once again discuss about the noting here. The answer is that either a note or draft by and large requires the same skills and style. Hence, we are using the words notes and drafts here.

3.2. Objectives

On completion of this unit, you will be able to:

1. Define what is a draft

2. Describe the skills required for drafting

3. Explain styles in Notes and drafts

4. Draft different types of communications with the given material

3.3. What is a Draft?

You will be having occasions in your office that either on a current or in the note file you will get an endorsement “Draft please” or “put up draft”. You will be putting up a draft for approval. Then what is a draft?

“A draft is a rough sketch of a communication to be issued after approval by the officer concerned”

Draft can be of any format of the communication you intend to send, may be a memorandum, letter, D.O. letter, Proceedings etc. This depends on the circumstances. Whatever is the type of communication, certain skills are required in preparing it. Let us now see:

3.4. Drafting skills

You should look at the following commands whenever you prepare a draft.

Commands and Essentials

Commands

Identity - SENDER

Adopt - RIGHT FORM

Visualize - RESPONSE

Express - CLARITY, CONSISTENCY UNIFORMITY

Avoid - REDUNDANCY, VERBOSITY CIRCUMLOCUTION, REPETITION

Summaries - COMPLEX & LENGTHY

You should also know what are the essentials of a draft? Let us see:

Essentials

Ø Clear, Concise, Incapable of Misconstruction

Ø Lucid, brief, complete

Ø Facts, direction, guidance

Ø Unit of idea

Ø Coherence of flow

Look at the following questions which will help you in preparing a draft.

Searching Questions – One Dozen

1. Is a draft necessary?

2. Who should be addressed and who will sign?

3. What is the relationship between the sender and receiver?

4. What should be the form?

5. Is something to be conveyed or to be called for?

6. Are all details available?

7. What is the intention of the decision?

8. What should be the recipient response?

9. Does the language convey?

10. Has the referencing been done?

11. Is it logically sequenced?

Points to be noted

1. Should carry the exact messages sought to be conveyed

2. Should be clear, concise and incapable of misconstruction

3. Should result in the desired response from the received

4. Should be divided into proper paragraph, according to the logical Sequence or order of ideas expressed in the draft

5. Should contain references to previous correspondence if any

Avoid:

1. Lengthy sentences

2. Abruptness

3. Repetition of words

4. Observations or ideas

5. Offending, discourteous language

3.5. Style in notes and drafts

The content alone will not serve the purpose. The style in notes and drafts is as important as their contents. Whenever a draft is prepared the following should be observed in drafting and also in writing notes.

Government will be treated as a plural noun and other departments and offices as a singular noun.

Communications intended to the High Court should be addressed only to the Registrar, High Court of AP.

The form of official correspondence between the district and divisional officers including the District Collectors, Revenue Divisional Officers, Assistant Collectors, Sub collectors, Deputy Collectors on the one hand and the Mandal Revenue Officers on the other hand will be in the shape of letter. This will apply to all other departments.

While avoiding the slang, one should aim at an easy natural style as near as possible in spoken English.

The expression “the undersigned” should not be used. It is very ugly and usually or often inaccurate, as the person who signs is often as a matter of fact not the person to whom the expression the undersigned is intended to refer.

Information is singular. If information is called for on many points, it does not become information

Let us now see some of the verbs, phrases we normally use and the relevance or need of them in our day to day drafting or noting.

1. The words proximo, idem and ultimo should be avoided. They are not necessarily even abbreviations, and they possess no other recommendations.

2. On the contrary, they lead to confusion, and one has to take the trouble of looking at the date of the letter to find out what they mean.

3. The names of the months must be used instead. “The same” must not be used. Instead of, “it” or some other simple word be used Needlessly formal words such as “therein” and “thereon” should not be used instead “in it” or “on it” be used.

Active Vs Passive Verbs

4. The preference for passive verbs overactive verbs generally make the style vague and clumsy. Look at the following

“it is understood” - “I do not understand”

“the date of issue of the order should be reported by him” - “he should report when he issues the order”

You should notice that the 1st two are in passive voice. Instead of writing like that it is better to write in active voice as given in the second set above.

Simple Vs Long Phrases

5. A simple or short word is to be preferred in place of long phrases. Examples of needless verbosity are preference of the simple:

“make the assessment” to “assess”

“purchase” to “ buy”

“commence” to “begin”

“omitted” or “failed” to “did not make”

“enquiries” for “enquire”

“building purpose” for “buildings”

“for being” instead of “to be”

“for doing” instead of “to do”

Where “omit” by itself is proper and sufficient, the love of such redundant phrases is displayed as “has been omitted to be entered in the register”.

Another widespread error is the use of “for being” instead of “to be” and “for doing” instead of “to do” and “returned for being stamped” instead of “to be stamped”.

Foreign OR Classical Words

6. Foreign or classical words and expression should be avoided as far as possible, vernacular words should only be used when their meaning cannot be expressed equally well in English.

Short Vs Long Sentences

7. Short sentences should be preferred to long ones.

“Director’s attention is invited to the letter. He is requested ------.” is better than “The Director’s attention is invited to the letter, and he is requested”.

1. The word “necessary” is usually superfluous.

2. In such cases, phrases as “the necessary entries”, “the necessary

3. corrections”, “the necessary instructions” be used.

“In case in which” is a phrase. Instead of it

“When”. “Where”, or “If” can be used.

8. The phrase “do the needful” should never be used.

You should always say definitely what is to be done or say, “do what is necessary”.

The word “avail” is very awkward one, as it is reflexive and also takes “of” after it. It is better to avoid it. Ex: “the leave was availed of” etc. Instead, you can say “took the leave”.

Similarly, “available” is also a bad word. It should be definitely stated instead of it is not available.

9. Split infinitives should be avoided. Better to write as “kindly to state” instead of “to kindly state”.

Look at the following sentence:

“The Officer will, in the circumstances now stated, be requested”

This can be improved. Instead, you can say “in the circumstances now stated, the officer will be requested to.”

10. Do not write “marginally noted” which could only mean having marginal notes. write “noted in margin”.

Similarly, “plan marked” could only mean marked with plans and be avoided.

Not always short – It should be clear

11. A phrase like the “figures for 1949, 1950, and 1951 were 256,257 and 348 respectively” which is confusing, better to write “the figure for 1949 was 256 and 1950 was 257 and that for 1951 was 348.

This may be little longer than the first one. But it is perfectly clear, is it not?

“Former” and “Later” should also be avoided as they are constant source of confusion.

12. Some persons begin every letter “with reference to”. It is better to use the phrase “in reply to”. Avoid the phrase “with advertent to”

13. In ordinary English “in case” does not mean the same as “if”. I shall take my umbrella in case it rains means so as to be prepared for rain.

14. The fondness for writing “as well as” for “and”; “in case” for “if” presumably arises from the fondness of the users for a longer expression. Depending upon the need they should be carefully selected.

15. “As such” is often misused. It is correct to say Mr. A was then the Superintendent and as such was bound to report, but…”

If it is written as “A was not then the superintendent as such he is not to be blamed”, it becomes meaning less. Instead of “as such” some other suitable words can be used here.

“While such being the case” is a familiar embellishment of criminal complaints etc. “don’t you see the word “while” is redundant here?

Tenses

16. Tenses and moods are misused in almost every note or draft. Look at the following two sentences:

a) “I had gone to bed at 10 o’clock last night”

b) “I had gone to bed when the house caught fire”

Now note down your observations on the two sentences in the box given below:

Activity - Participants Activity (Please see the workbook)

17. “Must have” is sometimes misused for “should have” or “ought to have” means that he certainly has done it. It is not to be used to mean that he has not done it but should have.

18. “Till” is commonly misused in a way that it positively misleading.

Ex: “No reply was received till January 1st” implies that a reply was Received on January 1st. But it is used erroneously to mean that even on January 1st no reply had been received.

It is better if this meaning is to be conveyed use “up to” and now See: “No reply was received up to January 1st”. This is the correct way of writing.

19. few colloquial phrases, “All the stamps have not been punched”, is ambiguous.

Better to write “not all the stamps have been punched” or “the Stamps have not all been punched”. It means that some have been Punched and some not.

20. Look at this sentence “He has yet to collect Rs.1000” which is not modern English. “He still has to collect” is the correct usage.

Generally, “Yet” may be used as a negative. Look at this sentence “has not yet applied”. It is used only with a positive verb in special phrases ex: “I have yet to learn”

21.“So is not equivalent to very”. It is sometimes written “the peon is so impertinent”, “I warned him so many times” meaning “very impertinent”, “very often”.

22.“Not so bad” means “rather good”. But this is a colloquial phrase.

23.“Too” has a relative sense. It implies excess relatively to a certain standard or object not absolute intensity to speak (except in written, “it is too hot” meaning “it is very hot”.

24.“to hope” implies pleasurable anticipation. It is used sometimes instead of a neutral word such as “think” and thereby producing comically in appropriate phrases such as “I hope your honour is ill”.

25.“As to” is common redundant from. EX: “The Deputy Commissioner is directed to report as to whether”; here whether alone is sufficient. So also “as against” or “as compared with” are commonly used in comparing figures. It is sufficient if written as “against” or “compared with”.

Look at this: “As compared with last harvest, the yield was poor”, is correct.

“Yield was 4 rupees as compared with 8 rupees last year” is incorrect.

26. Pseudo accuracy accounts for much unnecessary verbiage. “If any” is a common example of this fault. It is unnecessary to say the Deputy Commissioner is requested to report the number of cases, if any.

27. The phrases “at all”, “care to”, “in spite of” sometimes sounds needlessly discourteous and unidiomatic. It is rude to write “In spite of three reminders the DC has not at all cared to reply”

It is enough if written “The DC has not replied”

28. Avoid using pretentious words such as “penultimate”. Use “last but one”

29. “I am directed to request that you will be so good as to furnish me with information as to whether” is the sort of stuff that we come across frequently. “I am directed to enquire whether” means exactly the same and is not unduly curt.

30. Never use several words where one will do.

Incorrect Correct

“make an application” “apply”

“level of the value of 50 paise only” “a fifty paise stamp”

You should note that the addition of “only” after any sum is mostly used in bills and cheques and not everywhere.

31.“In this connection” at the beginning of a sentence is a favourite bit of hackneyed padding. It means nothing at all.

32.“In returning here with” a favourite but inappropriate type of opening phrases.

33. A needless anxiety to avoid repetition gives rise to various faults.

Sometimes instead of repeating a person’s name, it is said as “the Individual”. This is not good English.

34. The words “comprise”, “compose” and “consists” are often confused with each other. It is written “the land comprises of 3 plots”. The correct forms are “the land comprises / consists of / is composed of three plots”.

35. “Agree” and “tally” cannot be used actively. Figures may agree or tally. You cannot “agree” figures or “tally” them. Generally, use unpretentious words rather than propouones.

36. “I proceeded to camp” is incorrect. “I went to camp” is correct.

37. Similarly use “live” or “dwell” and not “reside”

38. “Instead of” is more commonly used than “in lieu of” which is used in legal matters.

39. “Stamp” is ordinary English, not “Label”

40. “Envelope” or “letter” most commonly used, not “cover”.

41. You cannot say “he told/expressed that he was unwilling”. It must be “he told me that he was unwilling”, “he expressed his unwillingness”.

42. “Enough of money” is not good English. Better to say “enough money”. “of” follows “enough” when for any reason it is necessary to use “enough” as a substantive. Ex: “I have had enough of this”, “I don’t know enough of the language”.

43. Using the word “None” is obsolete and poetical. Instead, you can use “no one”.

44. Do not quality expressions, needlessly. Words like “it seems” and “It appears” are used when there is really no doubt.

45. “He was absent in his house” meaning that he was elsewhere than in his house is a contradiction in terms. “Absent from” is correct, but the ordinary English would be “he was not at home” or simply “he was away” or “was out”

46. “Also” is misused with negatives. Look at this sentence:

“He did not address the letter. Assistant Director did not also stamp it”.

Instead, you can say - “A.D. did not stamp it”.

47. “He puts himself up at ----.” or “he is put up at”, are wrong. The correct English is “He is putting up at”.

48. Saying “Wooden piece” is a common error. Correct one is “piece of wood”.

49. “I enquired into the witness” is another frequent mistake. You “examine” a witness and “enquire into” a case. But one does not “investigate into a case”, one “investigates” it.

50. “Male Member” should not be used to mean “male” or “man”.

51. Similarly “my family members” to “members of my family”.

52. “Through” meaning “past” and “cross” meaning “went past” are frequently used. Ex: I went through the temple, or I crossed the temple. You cross a river or a road when you go from one side of it to the other. Isn’t it?

53. Do not use such phrases as “has breathed his last” or “is no more”. Better use “is dead”.

54. “It is high time to do so and so” is an idiomatic English phrase.

55. “In view to do” so and so is wrong. You can say “with a view to reducing” meaning “in order to reduce”.

56. You can say “in view of the circumstances” meaning having regard to them But, it is wrong to say, “In view to”.

57. “You should insist on the Director to reply” is wrong. It should be “should insists on his replying”

58. “Address” is used sometimes as though it meant, “ask”, which is wrong.

3.6. Summing up

We have started with discussing about what is a note in unit 1 of this module. Discussed various aspects of preparing a note. Then went further ahead and discussed about the various types of communications that are used in government offices. Finally came to unit 3 and started our discussion with “What is a Draft?”.

From the beginning of this course, we agreed that office is an Information processing centre, and the main objective of an office is to dispose of cases. How do we dispose of cases? By meeting the demands of public by communicating the decisions on their demands. It is, therefore, essential to communicate to the other person in such a way that he/she understands what we intend to tell. To help in this task, in this unit we have learnt about:

1. What is a Draft?

2. Drafting skills

3. Styles in Notes and Drafts

We tried to bring lot of examples of wrong usage of words and phrases and also tried to give the correct way. However, we suggest you to take up further acquaintance of the subject by looking into the notes and drafts put up in your office.

3.7. Self-Assessment